Underworld Personals

The first step in internet dating is creating a profile; you post some photos of yourself, and you list your personal characteristics. You include some interesting facts about yourself and perhaps a funny anecdote or two to show off your sense of humor. And if you’re at all blessed with the gift of the gab, you can probably write a novella about your life while you’re at it.

Now the fun begins; it’s time to start searching for the man or woman of your dreams. Using the site’s built in search, you select your dream date’s criteria, hit the search button and wait for the results. Seconds later, your matches are displayed.

Now before you get too comfortable reading them, here are some things you should watch out for when looking for your Prince or Princess Charming. Qualities that speak volumes about a person, in a less than flattering way!

Spitefulness. The occasional sarcastic remark disguised as a joke is amusing. But if your date has nothing but sarcastic and critical things to say about the people in his or her life, think twice. Ask yourself this question; If your date says nothing upbeat and encouraging about anyone else, what is he or she going to say about you?

Past relationships. Almost everyone has had one, and that in itself is not an issue. But if your date has a half a dozen scary relationship stories, it should send up a red flag. You’ve likely had one or two of your own, and hopefully you’ve learned a thing or two, which is all perfectly normal. But someone who is a perennial victim is not likely to have learned anything from past mistakes.

Inappropriate Anger. Hey we all get angry sometimes, so what’s the big deal? Run of the mill anger isn’t an issue, but inappropriate anger is. People who get angry at anything and everything rarely take responsibility for their own happiness; they’d rather blame others. And sooner or later you’re going to be in the line of fire.

Polar Opposites. It’s true that opposites attract, but some differences are just too great to ignore. Big issues about which you are on opposite sides of the fence like religion, whether or not to have children, and drinking and drugs, are relationship killers. You may have fun in the short term, but long term? Not so much.

Dating and internet dating is all about getting to know someone. Figuring out whether that person as a whole “fits” you. Your choosing someone to spend your life with, so choose wisely!

You haven’t had a date in months, and it certainly isn’t due to lack of trying! But for some reason nothing you do seems to work; not your flirting, not your internet dating profile and not your pleas to family and friends to introduce you to someone, anyone!

Nothing turns off potential daters faster than appearing so desperate for a date that you’ll do almost anything to get one. In extreme cases, dating desperation can seem almost creepy. At best it’s just kind of sad.

Stop trying so hard! In most things social, trying too hard gives the opposite result of what you want. Trying too hard to attract or keep a date will always backfire. Remember that love will come in its own good time; you can’t force it. So stop putting so much pressure on that guy or gal you met on an internet dating service; it it’s meant to be things will progress at their own pace.

Those little white lies you tell in the hopes of appearing more attractive to someone are going to end up biting you in the butt sooner or later, so you might as well stop telling them. Potential daters will be able to tell, deep down, that you’re lying and along with appearing desperate, you’ll come across as insincere.

As a desperate dater, you want potential dates to like you. So you end up agreeing with everything they say and come off looking like a bobblehead doll what with all the nodding you’re doing! There’s nothing wrong with polite disagreement! That’s what good conversation is made off, and gives you each the chance to learn about each other.

You’re a doormat. You’ve been stood up so many times you’ve lost count, and rather than tell your date how you feel, you simply accept his/her explanation. That’s the sign of a doormat. If you don’t respect yourself, why should anyone else? Self respect is the key to self confidence; and a must if you don’t want to appear desperate.

You sleep with someone even though you don’t really want to. Have sex with whomever you want, provided you feel ready to do so. By doing otherwise you’re setting yourself up as someone who’ll go to any lengths to please someone; and that’s desperation personified.

True dating desperation means dating anyone you can, regardless of whether or not you actually like them. If that sounds like you, you need some dating downtime. And you should use that time to get back in touch with yourself; to like yourself and enjoy your own company. If you like yourself, chances are that others will too!